There, that's it! You are now a Saint.
If you'd like something more substantial to prove you're a Saint, we offer a perfectly lovely Certificate of Canonization (On parchment! In Tudor font! Suitable for framing! Signed by His Honorable Fat-Baby Mother Sir, St. Pooch Himself!) for the paltry sum of $7.95 U.S., which includes shipping, tax, and the bother of doing the thing up and sending it off. Proceeds go to the St. Malmo Defense Fund ... or a really good party, whichever seems like a good idea at the time. Just go back to the Cathedral and punch the Order Form Now, press the little button and join us!
Forms by Flaming Hooker