[All Saints and Petitioners, kindly wipe your feet before entering.]

The Last-Chance Cathedral and Discount House of Worship


Welcome All Saints & All Ye Who Would Be Saints!

"So, what fresh hell is this?" -- Dorothy Parker


If you've enough smarts to seek us out, you're more than qualified for Sainthood. Fill in the form, pick yourself a Saintly name that suits you, and welcome to the Poochian Order. Now, read on.

Oh! Our last month's UPDATE mistakenly listed an open invitation for a party at St. Rodney The Weird's Place, when it should have been St. Rodney The WIRED's. The Staff (it comforts me, but not as much as my ROD!) and I wish to apologize to any who were scandalized, sodomized, or otherwise discomfitted.

Welcome to the Cosmic Home Page of the Poochian Order, unabashed purveyors of TRUTH, JUSTICE, and the AMERICAN WAY. So, what the hell is this? You might well ask. In essence it is an attempt to cut through the usual malarky sanctioned by so-called 'organized' religions (implying, one would suppose, that other religions are merely spontaneous quirks a la 'Holy shit! There's an oddly-shaped rock, let's worship it!') and coming up with something we can live with. Better yet, something that suits our style.

Within these pages we attempt to answer the age-old whine, 'Is NOTHING sacred any more?'. The answer, of course, is a resounding NO. We'll also delve into the rhetorical question, 'Is it the promise of Heaven or the threat of Hell that tends to dictate our morality?' This latter may or may not be rhetorical, since I just made it up, but I think that if we ask ourselves (and anyone else we can inflict ourselves upon) this question often enough, it will soon become rhetorical. We'll also have some fun, since some of your Fellow-Saints are Borderline Wacko, and the rest are well South of that Border.

So, again, Welcome St. Whoever You Are. Probe around a bit, digest a dose of wisdom and leave us a little of yours, if you feel like it. We really don't care much either way, which is pretty much our Principal Dogma here in the Poochian Order, so deal with it. --- St. Pooch, Patron Saint of Cleavage & Breast Implants.

Saint Enrollment Form (Instant Canonization, be the First on Your Block!)
'Is Nothing Sacred Any More?' (A philosophical answer & some background)
Miscellaneous Musings (About what it says, feel free to contribute your own)
Fellow Saints News Update (The Poochian Gossip Sheet)
ATYPICAL SPORTS (kind of)
Neat Stuff (Assorted links to other fun places, again, contributions graciously accepted)
Reach Out And TOUCH ST. POOCH! (send me a note, death threat, good joke, whatever ...)

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The ALLSAINTS Page made possible by the good-hearts (and gentle bribing of) Flaming Hooker Web Services & DragoNet.com.

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